So..I’ve been away. Doing what you might ask?
Well, to be honest, I was busy falling in love. And not metaphorically, I fell into the rhythms of life with an amazing young lady that I’ve known for a little while. She is smart, wise, compassionate, and called me on my bull$hi*. I tripped into love with her and when I looked up it was March. Guess that’s the way these things go. *sigh*
However, we are not together at the moment. *record screeches to a stop* I know, I know. That was quick. It wasn’t her fault. It was simply a matter of logistics. (And maybe my overly analytical mind) Short answer: She was a little further along in life and ready for more than I was (i.e. marriage); I, on the other hand, feel the need to tackle some life goals and accomplish some things. These things were and are (I think) integral to my development as a man and thus would affect my ability to lead a woman in a relationship.
Some of these goals are listed on the blog, some are not. They were spiritual goals, financial goals, and life-design goals. Time is short, and there’s a small but growing panic that if I don’t tackle these goals now, I’ll never achieve them. Anyway these niggling thoughts and goals kept bumping up against the time I invested in the relationship and soon their muted cries grew to a mutinous chorus. I tried to explain all this to my amour but I wonder if all she heard is “I don’t want this”. Anyway, after much prayer and ignoring the answers, we decided to end it before we got too deep.
Which brings me to my update for those weeks. *embarrassed chuckle*
Debt Reduction goal: I was able to put an extra $1000 towards my school debt during this time period. Bringing the total spent on student loans for this time period to $2070. Which looking back – is $100 more than I spent extra last month. However, its also $120 less than the actual goal = 1120 extra per month. A loan that wasn’t active last month came back on-line which is why although the total raised significantly, the amount extra isn’t significantly more.
Creating Music: The last beat I made was on February 5th..basically a month ago. Ouch. This is probably the category that took the biggest beating from my love.
Being Brave: Actually, the relationship was amazing for this category. I faced many fears while I was in this relationship; the biggest of which was probably allowing myself to trust someone again. Fully. Also the decision to leave the relationship wasn’t easy – especially considering my propensity for people-pleasing and wanting to make her happy.
Travel: I went on an amazing trip in the North GA mountains with a group of friends. It was awesome. I’m also planning on Vegas in July, ?? in March, and possibly the dominican republic in August. I also hope to Volunteer for a mission trip in the fall. We’ll see how it goes.
P.s. Looking back ..maybe the relationship was more help than harm? We’ll have to see I guess. Here’s to continued growth!